broken soul still holds
by ARF99321
Summary: it was his cold hand on my neck his harsh voice in my ear everthing was shutting down.
1. Jelly fish

The morning mist seemed to make everything vague or a back round part in a painting. Tohru's head was poking out of the paper door in Shigure's home inspecting the day.

_Hmmm, i think it's going to rain today; poor Kyo_ Tohru giggled thinking of Kyo's mood on days like this. "Tohru" A muffled voice called from inside the house. Tohru disappeared back into the house to follow the call. "Tohru" Shigure's voice sang, she followed the voice into the kitchen and greeted him with a smile. "Tohru, would you like to come with me on an errand?" Shigure asked and before she could respond he added "I would be so alone on that long, long walk" he put on his best depressed face and sighed dramatically. Tohru grinned "where are we going?" _My flower is such a pushover_ Shigure thought "TO THE LAUDRY STORE!" Shigure marched out the door way while Tohru shuffled behind him to find an umbrella. The minute they stepped outside it started to drizzle. Tohru opened the umbrella and held it high over their heads. They walked in silence it seemed to loom over them like a…. like a curse. Shigure was staring strait ahead. _A jelly fish, _Tohru thought _when every you get close enough to know his thoughts he just floats away._ She wondered what he was thinking. Lost in her thought she hardly noticed she had yawned. Shigure turned and smiled and took the umbrella from Tohru "I'll carry" he whispered like a secret brushing a stray hair from Tohru's face. She must have blushed at least eighteen different shades of red. Shigure turned forward once more _a jelly fish _Tohru thought again _is a very accurate stament for Shigure. _"We're here!" Shigure sang proudly throwing his hands in the air. That brought his attention to his watch. "My, my the time says it's 4:00 a.m I think you should head back to the house."

"Are you sure" Tohru asked "Completely, this will only take a moment sorry for dragging you all this way." "N-no it's fine! I'll head back if it will make you happy!"

Shigure smiled "It will". Tohru left the umbrella with Shigure even though had insisted she take it. The truth was, she had no idea where she is going. To make matters worse it started to pour. But Tohru kept searching the fog for something familiar. She was drenched and she new she had a cold. She sniffled and kept moving forward. Something large came into view emerging from the fog. _The main house_ Tohru gasped. She was finally aware she was at the front gate. _This is your chance, this your chance to look for a something, anything that can break the curse _Tohru urged herself. She remembered the hole in the gate Momo had taken her through. Inspecting the gate she spotted it and shuffled over to it. _Achoo_ Tohru sneezed _I might have a fever_ _I know my way home from here I should go home and come back another day. _ _Coward,_ Tohru told herself she slipped through the hole. Tohru gasped, she could be _**arrested! **_ She turned to go back through the hole but something stopped her she was right in front of Akito's quarters. Tohru gathered her courage and turned around and stepped forward

Back at the house

"Tohru I'm back!" Shigure yelled. "Tohru, TOHRU!" "SHUT UP!" two voices yelled in unison Yuki and Kyo both hit Shigure on the head _hard_. "OWWWWWWWW" Shigure said "Why are you guys so mean? Aren't I right Tohru? Tohru?" all three men looked around for any signs of Tohru attending the family quarrel. There was no familiar _tup tup tup tup _on the wooden floor. Yuki and Kyo's eyes lit up in anger and they both swiveled to face Shigure, practically lunging at him they both grabbed his collar and lifted him off the ground "Where is Tohru" They demanded " I-I don't know" Shigure said " I said she could come back here and I would finish up I-I don't know!" The both put him down. Both people imagining Tohru lost in the rain coughing a wheezing. Yuki turned flaring with fear and anger " did it ever occur to you that she didn't know the way back or that a shady creature might of… might have" He stopped _I have to find her_ he thought and ran out the door. Kyo tried to follow but just fell _darn, it's raining! _ _please be okay, I'll die if not._

Back at the main house

Tohru inched closer. Every sound she made seemed to echo though out every wall. She saw no shadows or heard no murmuring, Tohru heard someone rustling inside Akito's room. Most likely someone with a restless sleep, most likely, probably not. Possibly Akito, Probably Akito. She slid open the sliding paper door. The room was pitch black, not a single light shone. She slid in a quiet as possible. Tohru was trembling and chills were going up and down her spine. She was burning. She had a fever. Something cold touched the back of her neck like icy fingers. They slid their way around her neck and squeezed Tohru panicked and squirmed uncontrollably until the finger released their grip. A voice whispered in her ear " I will make you suffer"


	2. suffer

A/n Sorry how violent this chapter is, every one is suffering…..

The rain poured down furiously Yuki panicked. _Where is she?_ Seemed to be the only thing Yuki's mind focused on. The mist was blinding and was like a thick blanket without an end. Hardly paying attention he stumbled onto his knee's clutching his stomach so he wouldn't throw up. Yuki was coughing now, his hands wrapped around himself seemed to dig into his skin and he even thought he felt fresh warm blood on his sides. _Get off the ground _Yuki ordered himself, _you're pathetic_. Back on his feet again he saw he had dug his nails into his skin and blood was soaked through his shirt. He had one place left to check. **The main house. **

Back at the main house

Tohru eyes widened and knew immediately Akito's voice was the cold whisper. It was his harsh hand on her neck. "I thought I told you to mind you own business" He purred "you know that curious mind of your can get you into trouble" the darkness swallowed her up. She was blind, deaf to everything except Akito's words, everything was shutting down. Tohru was vaguely aware that something had glimmered in the moonlight. Silver long and slender. Akito was clutching it as if it was going to escape. He leaned down and pressed his lips to Tohru's ear "You need to learn your lesson"

Back to Yuki

Yuki stared frozen at the main gate. Fear had overtaken his body and he had thought more than once of abandoning Tohru. He really was… pathetic. He hadn't been to the main house since New Year. So he didn't know what to expect. That scared him. _Pathetic _he reminded him self and inched forward. He placed his hands over the wounds in his sides. _Selfish _he told himself. He took a giant step forward. _Pathetic, selfish, pathetic, selfish, pathetic-_ "STOP!" Yuki yelled placing his hands over his head and crouching to the ground. He placed his head between his knees. "Stop" he whispered. He slowly inched his head up to see something beyond is imagination but he knew, he knew it was real.

a/n review and I'll update fair enough??


	3. Pain

a/n 実はお願いがあるのですが。 貴社ますますご盛栄のこととお喜び申し上げまSorry how violent it is….again…

Tears blurred Tohru's eyes and she stifled a scream, afraid of attracting attention. Hot blood soaked Tohru's arm where Akito had traced the jagged blade. The open wound pierced her skin and she was breathing heavily. Warm tears rolled down her cheeks and she dropped to her knees. Akito offered Tohru a satisfied smile. "Now have you learned your lesson? Will you stay out of it now?" Tohru shook her head violently. Her heart weighed with pain. The open wound was deep and from shoulder to wrist. She clenched her fist of the unharmed arm, breathing even heavier. Akito smile disappeared and he forced the knife into her other arm, from shoulder to wrist. The darkness swallowed her. And Tohru's tears fell down harder, forming a small puddle next to the ones of blood. Her ears were closing up and Akito's words seemed to slur. The pain and the darkness seemed to combine and stab her soul. Her heart. The walls seemed to collapse. The walls inside her heart.

Back to the range

(Er… I mean Yuki)

Kureno was walking steadily along the pavement keeping his eye's fixed strait ahead, He looked exhausted and heartbroken. He was soaked from the rain which was coming harder than ever. Kureno was clutching his heart as if it was going to burst. Yuki hid behind a shrubbery as Kureno fumbled with the gates shoving it open. Kureno stopped and Stumbled to his knees and began to tear uncontrollably. He buried his face in his hands and stayed there. Kureno was crying. Yuki knew he was in love, in love and alone. Yuki threw his head up in the air and began to cry as well, because he knew how hard it was to be alone

The words were hard to make out. But the way his whisper cut at Tohru's soul once more. It hurt to breath. The pain on her arms is unbearable. "Punishment" Akito whispered harshly "You want to be a part of us?" Akito said raising his voice. "THEN YOU HAVE TO LIVE LIKE US!" Akito snatched up a near by vase and threw it at Tohru's head, this time Tohru Screamed. Blood was pouring down her face; the pain caused her to cry harder. Her scream faded. The darkness killed her. Her eye. The vase had slit her eye. Just like Hatori. Tohru's hand flew to her left eye and the stench of blood filled her body. Akito chuckled and kneeled next to her. Tohru "now do you understand what we go through, we go through pain beyond your dreams" Tohru's eye's widened. Pain blood and darkness, they were all there. If she let it in, she may never be able to get it out. Even though she had darkness kneeling beside her, even though it was whispering into her ear. She wasn't going to let it in.

A/n again review and I will update thnx… sorry.. That's the way it goes.


	4. torture

A/n reeeely violent…. Again! Oooh Japanese! (no Idea what it says) 貴社ますますご盛栄のこととお喜び申し上げます。毎々格別のご愛顧を賜り、厚く御礼申し上げます。Sry have a.d.d ooh a monkey! (Chapter really short as well)

Akito had tossed Tohru into the pitch black room like and unwanted child. Akito had also told her Yuki had been confined as a younger child "you will suffer like we do" the words of Akito echoed through her mind stinging her everywhere they reached. Tohru placed her head between her knees and began to cry once more. "We live in a pitch black world" Akito had said while locking her in the small room. "If you want to join us so do you." When the last bit of light disappeared Tohru tried to prevent the thought that, that was her hope disappearing, the last flame extinguished. The open wounds still had blood flooding over her arms down her face. The pain was unbearable. Tohru wanted to give up she wanted to _die_. More tears rolled down her face. She buried her face deeper into her knees. Tohru realized she was being tortured.

"You will suffer like we do"

Back to Yuki

How long had Yuki sat there crying for himself, for Kureno, for his tortured love, for losing the game he still had yet to play. The game of life. How long had he been wishing for what he had lost, a year? Two years? A lifetime? He realized, when seeing Kureno. That was too far in to the game to give up. The game wasn't lost, he was just losing. Yuki hoisted himself up and stood there for a moment. He was going to win; He was going through the gates, even if it meant the last flame would be extinguished, Even if it meant the last bit of hope disappearing. He was going to win; he was going to find Tohru.

Back to Tohru

There was no escape, No exit. Only pain and where she was. Only blood and darkness.

Tohru no longer knew how long she had layed there cradling her self. Crying quietly. Clutching her eye. Wanting to give up. Tohru's eye was piercing pain, her arms, the many scratches on her head caused by the vase thrown fiercely at her head. Even her legs which Akito had slit from knew to ankle. In the darkness she was lost overpowered, and dieing inside. She was still trying to prevent those thoughts. But she was falling apart. Akito had told her she was nothing. Over estimating herself, with her fairytale solutions. Tohru still felt the pang inside her, even just recalling the memory. The words still clung to her brain till she started to believe them. _Who do I think I am, I deserve this, this is my correct punishment, I am this low, and I can't break the curse. _Tohru thought furiously. Hot tears ran down her face. Pain piercing her eye, sill covered by her blood soaked hand. Tohru hugged her knees tighter, sending sparks up her arm from the open cut. Tohru wanted to make her self as small as possible. Wanted to disappear. "MAKE IT STOP!" Tohru screamed the words lingered. Breaking the silence that seemed like it would go on forever. The door separating her from freedom slowly opened, Akito stood there chuckling "learned your lesson Tohru" he said coldly. Tohru was silent. "WELL?" He yelled. Tohru nodded, and Akito smile returned. He stroked Tohru's cheek, "then I suppose your free to go" He opened the door facing the small hole Tohru had come in from. Tohru staggered out, every inch or moment sent pain up and down her legs arm face. Blood still pouring out of her wounds were blood. "Really Tohru, I hope one day we can be friends." Akito shut the door and silence once again her to the brim. The rain was coming down harder than ever. She had nowhere to go.

Torture


	5. broken

A/n in _my story_ Shigure's house is VERY far away from the main house, thank you for reminding me reader98. ( I know that yuki starts before tohru but I want tohru 2 get there before yuki so she is somehow faster….lets just say he tripped a lot.)

Tohru staggered out of the main house, every step sending sparks of throbbing pain throughout her body. Tohru shivered of frosty air and rain nipped at exposed wounds. Then shuddered recalling the memory of Akito's heartless stare, his merciless voice. Something about him though, seemed like he was guarding something. He seemed to acting on his own specific isolation from love. Tohru though was scarred in the act of that. It took all of her energy to merely edge her way along the pavement. Tohru's breath was short and forced with every gulp of air her lungs ached excruciatingly. Tohru felt staggeringly insignificant. Tohru felt as if no one desired her presence. Like no one needed her. Not monitoring her steps she stumbled towards the ground. Tohru sat there without the will to emerge. _ I'm weak _Tohru defined herself. The twinge of the bleeding cuts stung mercilessly. Tohru's smile was dieing. A swirl of mist clung to her head clouding her sight (of one eye) and thoughts. Tohru's heart ached for love. Warm, protecting. She wished for the sun. But the rain continuously came down simply washing away any hope that was left.

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Once Yuki had entered the main house he had searched everywhere. Trying to crouch low in moss and shrubbery, and the occasionally tree covered in green parasites. Few people were rising at this hour. Risking a glance a nearby clock, which he had read 6:15. He groaned trying to wake him up from sleep that was slowly forcing him from consciences. Yuki rubbed his eye's, recognizing the sense of dreariness and alone. There was new kind of energy, the seemed to urge him on at the moment he wanted to fall back. The rain held a sort of mist that made it incredibly hard to see. Shuffling towards and unknown direction, Yuki dropped to his knees curled into a ball when he heard footsteps. Coated in mud he laid there unmoving, while the foot steps sloshing in the wet ground passed. It felt good to lay there, as tired as he was. They were two sets of steps; Yuki realized trying to pull himself from fatigued sensation. Akito's unforgiving voice echoed through the houses. Yuki realized he was speaking to Kureno; His eye's were facing forward and was silent. "I believe she deserved the pain" Akito's bitter voice called. Kureno remained silent. "That girl, _that girl_" Akito spat "I hope she learns now that we must always be together. The bond that we have is all we need." The footsteps stopped and Akito turned towards Kureno placing a hand on his cheek "That is all we need" he whispered just loud enough for Yuki to hear. The food steps continued until faded. Yuki laid there motionless, eye's wide, breathless. "Tohru" he breathed to himself and sprung to his feet, He sprinting toward the gate. The rain whipped his face as he ran Breaking free of the confinement of the Main house. He ran frantically towards that last place left to look. His mind racing two words _not her, not her. _

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Tohru sat there wishing it all away. Tohru hoisted herself shakily to her feet, her body trembling at a dangerous speed. Her heart let go of a voice that told her where she could go to have a sense of peace, a sense of calmness. That way she could find the answer to the nagging questions that wouldn't leave her alone. _will I die? _ _Will I be found? _Tohru felt as if she was going to collapse at any second so she began to trudge where the smallest bit of serenity beckoned her, But no matter how small it was…. Tohru would take it.

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Yuki had run the way there; Rain and mist stinging his face his wet hair flying behind him. Yuki's feet made an even thud on the soil. He was coughing uncontrollably and trying to prevent himself from throwing up. Yuki's sides from where he had dug his nails stung, but he kept moving. He swiveled around trees and bushes. Then slowed and gradually came to a stop because he was at his destination. The secret base. There was a crumpled body that he recognized too well. A wave of sadness washed over him. Tohru was coated with blood, curled into a ball. She gave off the aura of "Broken". Yuki froze and then turned away. Tears rolled down his cheeks. Suddenly his sides was nothing, his coughing didn't matter. He was trapped in the moment of the fact he had failed. Yuki suddenly realized he didn't care anymore. His problems were nothing compared to Tohru's. A ripple on an ocean. There were souls broken worse than thank Yuki's

And one of those souls was Tohru.

A/N shout out: reader98 for this wonderful little paragraph: he slashed the knife over her soft skin ripping, tearing, killing. she cried out in pain, blood, blood, in her eyes mouth, blood. she screamed, his hand immediatly over her mouth, down to her throat. He choked her, can't breathe. Then, she dies as he slices her head off. Blood all over him, on his shoes. Sneering he stepped on her, spit on her, and left

Yup that was the paragraph full of dancing ponies! Anyway REVIEW!!!!!!


	6. saved by death

Toruh leaned on the grass, letting the wet moisture fill her up. Something caught her attention. A small noise, hardly even noticeable. The sound repeated the same word. She listened again. This time she heard foot steps. She felt something warm kneel next to her. She forced a glance, she didn't have the energy to do anything more. Her stare remained when she saw a resemblance in the figure. It was difficult to tell and excruciatingly painful as well. But she recognized the figure kneeling beside her, it was Kyo. She heard heavy breathing coming from not too far behind her. Now that she was listening, sounds came louder then regular. Or was it her weakened senses made the other once stronger. Kyo's face was leveled with her's. His neon orange hair piercing in the dull area. His face was unreadable, also because she couldn't see mostly at all. Another figure moved forward standing above Kyo. The sound of wet grass seemed to echo above her own thoughts. Yuki was her here as well. For the first time in what seemed like hours, Tohru felt safe. She let her self drain out all the emptiness, and let her be renewed with all the happiness that came rushing at her. Painfully, but happily she rose to her feet, stumbling forward on the first try. But attempting once more. Her feet felt unsafe on the ground but she hiked towards Shigure's house none the less. She felt Kyo and Yuki close behind, reassured a catch if stumbled. When the door opened a wave of relief hit Tohru strait in the heart. She almost fell forward. The whole way there she heard Yuki mumbling things like 'how did _he_ get there' and 'I failed Tohru'. She tried to push the memory from her head. And then Tohru died. Collapsing the ground the body hit the floor with a thud, leaving all who witnessed the startling death awe struck. Later every one attended the funeral, Every Sohma there. Including Akito. Akito decided to apologize to Tohru though we will never really know if he is forgiven. After her death Akito died shortly after of his large burden he had to bear as the head Sohma. After Every one of the Sohma's grew old always haunted by the curse. Then they all died and the curse continued.

_**THE END!**_


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